When the Wound Comes From the Place That Was Supposed to Cover You

When the Wound Comes From the Place That Was Supposed to Cover You

The

Healing Room

Church hurt is one of the most confusing wounds to carry—especially when faith, family, and fellowship are intertwined.

Many people assume church hurt only comes from leadership failures, congregational conflicts, or spiritual abuse within church walls. But sometimes, the deepest wounds come from those closest to us—family members who share our faith, raised us in the church, or spoke Scripture while mishandling our hearts.

This kind of pain is disorienting because it doesn’t just challenge relationships—it can challenge trust, belonging, and even one’s understanding of God.

When Faith and Family Collide

When hurt originates from family members who claim the same faith, it can leave you questioning whether distance is disobedience, or boundaries are betrayal. The internal conflict often sounds like this:

“If I forgive, do I have to stay?”“If I leave, am I walking away from God?”“If I speak up, am I being rebellious?”

These questions don’t come from rebellion. They come from a soul trying to reconcile truth with lived experience.

God Is Not the Author of Confusion

One of the most important distinctions healing requires is this:God is holy, but people are human.

Spiritual harm often occurs not because God failed, but because His name was attached to behavior He never endorsed. When Scripture is used without love, accountability, or humility, it becomes distorted—and that distortion wounds.

Healing begins when we separate who God is from how people represented Him.

Discernment Is Not Bitterness

Choosing distance for the sake of healing is not bitterness—it is wisdom.Forgiveness does not require proximity.Reconciliation requires repentance, but healing requires honesty.

Sometimes God leads us away, not because we lack faith, but because He is preserving it.

A Note From My Book "Unarmored"

In Unarmored, I share a story of navigating church hurt that involved both spiritual spaces and family dynamics. That story isn’t shared to indict anyone—it’s shared to remind readers that they are not weak for feeling wounded, and they are not faithless for needing space to heal.

God does not ask us to remain armored forever. He invites us to lay down what protected us once, so He can tend to what still needs healing.

A Gentle Reflection

If you are carrying pain connected to church, family, or faith, consider this:

• What part of your heart has been asking for acknowledgment, not dismissal?

• Where might God be inviting you to heal—not harden?

• What boundaries might be protecting your calling, not threatening it?

Healing is not a rejection of faith.It is often the deepest expression of it.

Glory Fruit

May the God who sees in secret tend to the wounds no one else acknowledged.May truth replace confusion, and peace follow discernment.And may your faith emerge quieter—but stronger—than before.